Shit My Honey Should See

surgeongenerals:

i feel like this is really important
4gifs:

A reminder from the conductor that train tracks aren’t playgrounds. [video]
plemur:

derekzane:

thunreswine:

oeste:

misterhippity:

I tried a 2-D printer once, and the paper jammed.
So now I just painstakingly re-create my paper copies by hand, like a medieval monk.

i tried using paper, but the edges crumpled
so now i just chisel my commandments into stone, like old testament god

i tried carving in stone, but the chisel chipped
so now I preserve my history and law in oral tradition through generations of trained storytellers

I tried storytelling, but I developed a stutter. So now I simply point at things and grunt, like cavemen before the invention of language.

I tried pointing at things and grunting but my finger is crooked so now I just secrete pheromones like our animal ancestors.
stuffparty:

Cats on leashes is probably the funniest thing I ever see.

By using logic like a laser to examine all the available evidence, I have come to the conclusion that my current belief that I am a master of deductive reasoning is due to the fact that I just binge-watched “Elementary”.

(Source: aedison)

luckyshirt:

WHO LET THE DOGS IN
CAT.
CAT. CAT. CAT.
tomofbedlam:

ashleeattacks:

thealphagentleman:

∆

YAAAAAAS

true story